Friday, December 7, 2018

Weekly Movie Review: Unfriended - Dark Web (2018)

Ok. This time I actually watched the sequel. I have to say I enjoyed it better than the first one. Premise was cool; idea of the dark web/members applied to a real life scenario was well executed. No over-gore, hardly any actually, but still managed to be quasi-creepy and suspenseful. Not the greatest horror movie in the world but definitely not a bad one.

5.5/10

Friday, November 30, 2018

Weekly Movie Review: Knock Knock (2015)

Solid movie. Felt like a riff on home invasion horror, but also brought a new element to it: female attacker(s) and a male victim. Suspenseful, intriguing, and Keanu is just, well, so Keanu. Plays up a pedophilic/cheating angle, heavily, and yet somehow makes you sympathize more with a victim in Keanu than his aggressors. Nice commentary by Eli Roth as an example from the other side of statutory rape. And bigger commentary (last few lines of the movie) on how, societally, this has become more problematic and more of an issue, fueled more so by social media. Not highly recommended from a pure horror standpoint, but recommended enough from a cinema standpoint.

6.5/10

Saturday, November 24, 2018

Weekly Movie Review: The Nun (2018)

Nun = none = the amount of times I felt scared during this movie. Holy shit. That was miserable. I had such high hopes for this movie after the Insidious and Conjuring movies, but man, what a letdown. Even the jump scares weren’t scary. The only thing redeeming about this was the setting and aesthetics; it’s shot beautifully, but even Christ can’t save this movie. Wan, I’m disappointed you allowed this to happen.

2/10

Monday, November 19, 2018

Weekly Movie Review: Unfriended (2014)

While it was a clever take on the killer picking off white, California, high school kids, it ultimately came down to a lack of execution (typical for horror movies these days). The movie did a good job at building suspense, keeping my attention, and making me want all the characters to die, but the death scenes were mostly lazy and majority of the scares were jump scares. The whole movie taking place from a laptop-Skype session was creative and well-executed, but overall was trite and overdone.

4.5/10

Sunday, November 11, 2018

Weekly Movie Review: Sharknado (2013)

They’ve made 6 of these apparently. and the 82% on rotten tomatoes was intriguing; everyone saying “it’s so bad it’s good.” But it was just bad. I get that maybe it was supposed to be awful, like Troll 2 or The Room, but at least those were funny. This was just abysmal, in every way. It was sunny for majority of the film where a hurricane is supposed to be taking place. The fuck? And nothing redeeming about it except for the credits signifying the end of 90 minutes I just wasted. Please. Never watch this movie.

0.5/10

Sunday, October 21, 2018

Weekly Movie Review: Unsane (2018)

More of a thriller than horror, but still worthy of a watch-through. You can’t always count on Soderbergh to put together an awesome cast but this one was damn near flawless. Protagonist was a marvel of paranoia and fear, antagonist was creepy and deranged, supporting cast was killer. And the fact that the entire film was shot on an iPhone is just bananas; gives the movie a weird, vintage feel, but Soderbergh still manages to keep it fresh with creative use of camera angles and film-style - instances such as talking directly to the camera. As I said before, not really a horror flick - the idea of the film is scarier than the execution of the film - but still thrilling enough to give it a shot.

6.5/10

Friday, October 5, 2018

Shouldering Heaven

And I was sad
and all the sadder guests at the garden wedding
were dancing
in their question-marked clothing

minds once sewn
with threads now unraveling
down to the roots
of dead trees.

Where are we that we are not home?
Where is home now that the world has turned black?

And you and all
and the gothic melancholy unconscious:
dancing dreams
across the closed eyes of danceless dreamers

a singular mind amidst
the lot of them all, all
down between the cracks and grooves
of dead streets.

Where are we that we are where?
When did nowhere scream “now here” out of the cold walls?

A moth
a melon
a veil
a villain